part 1 :

feel so silly when i cannot hold a job for 3 months
nobody ever wants to watch a movie anymore

raise my hands in surrender
i wanna get lost, i wanna never be found, i wanna disappear

spending college majoring in bullshit and wasting all my time online
oh my God it’s deafening to hear your voice all of the time
please just shut the door behind you, everything’s a mess when you speak
i don’t know what's wrong, if i did i’d probably fix it my-

viewing accounts that for my sake i blocked
i ran out the car and laid down in the parking lot
“i give up” i said, “i give up” i said

showed up the party early, made out in your closet
“i’m losing my strength,” she said “i’m losing my strength”
and i was losing mine, in fact the whole room was spinning
and my phone rang out for help, my phone was dying

every second spent with your father is a nightmare
pretending he does not care
crying in the backseat, describe it as amazing
my stomach keeps on turning
desecrate your local church it’s only the beginning
five minutes never ending
choking like its glue it tasted kind of bitter
clung to me like geum burs

(i don’t know what's wrong, if i did i’d probably fix it myself)
(forgive yourself)

part 2 :

God is kind to me cause i am kind to them
God is mean to me cause i am mean to them
my heart is full of love, my stomach : psilocybin
i made my way to heaven, it paved the way to heaven
i am in still in love- i cannot deny it
but i know it’s way too late for that
roman architecture, just skip another lecture
i hate myself when i look in the mirror

eat a tab a day just so i get through it
i’ve been giving up on all my dreams, oh shit
i hate when people tell me how to dress
i hate when people tell me to “get over it”
my friends all suck but i hate myself just as much
my friends are great but i still hate myself a lot

oh,
the ocean washed over your grave

i’d be your gay son’s favourite fucking popstar
if only i could get myself out of bed
i’d be the one that’s always fun at parties
if only i could get myself out of my bed
i’d be your local fucking emo cliché
oh wait i already am
i’d be the one you always fucking wanted
oh wait i thought i was

part 3 :

one evening in sorrento
the weather was torrential
i took a walk
fell flat on my face
the humming birds were laughing
under their trees

you were pretty like the leaves
you were pretty in ‘20
you were pretty like the sky
won't you leave me in ‘20
i was spinning like the earth
i could not forget
sing about it like its over
maybe then i’ll let go
maybe you’ve already moved
maybe you’re already gone
maybe everything was a dream
maybe i should move on

i’ll be your hometown shitty fucking memory
and you’ll mine

i bought that disk like you wanted
everything is haunted by you
survivor’s guilt in my membrane
everything is ending, oh god
lose my shit when i wake up
we didn’t even break up
we never even dated
broke my phone in a car crash
everything’s a flashback
i fucking hate it

y2k fucking cliché
stolen personality,
aim and hilary duff
voicemails, lip gloss, and kraft dinner
forever fucking winter,
117 blisters

i’d be your gay son’s favourite fucking popstar
i’d be the one that’s always fun at parties
i’d be your local fucking emo cliché
i’d be the one you always fucking wanted

(just put the knife down)
(let’s burn the fucking church)
(oh what a nightmare)
(let’s burn the fucking church)

(i’ll just take a bus)
(i’ll just watch it burn)
(and all the smoke inside)
(oh it hurts my eyes)
(and all the rain in the world)
(oh it couldn’t stop)
(everything from turning)
(to ash and dust)

God loves me because i love them
and God hates me because i hate them
the river is where i found her,
Connie, i’m sorry, i swear